Sunday, 28 August 2011

Joel Osteen [on relationships]

"People enter relationships with set standards and expectations. When people do not meet the standards we set, we become disenchanted with the relationship, allowing disappointment and frustration to set in. It's easy to get along with people when everything is going great and others are acting exactly the way we want them to. But what happens when something goes wrong and our feelings get hurt? If you're not careful, you'll begin to focus on the unmet expectations which will affect your attitude, and ultimately, your relationship.

But it doesn't have to be that way if we will just learn to have realistic expectations and let people off the hook. We can avoid a lot of heartache by simply giving people room to be human. We have to accept the fact that nobody is perfect, and even the best people will fail us at times. We have to choose forgiveness because it is not up to anyone in our lives to keep us happy; that is our own responsibility. Too often, we want our mate to cheer us up when we are down; we expect our partner to always be loving and kind. We expect our boss to recognize our hard work and our friends to always be there for us. But those are unrealistic expectations. The perfect spouse does not exist, nor does the perfect boss, nor the perfect friend.  

We would avoid a lot of disappointments by simply understanding that no matter how much we love people, no matter how much they love us, at some point, they won't live up to our expectations, or they will hurt our feelings in some way. 

But when we get our eyes off their shortcomings and on to Jesus, we open the door for His grace and healing in our relationships. We open the door for love which is all that matters in eternity."

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